Untitled: Thursday, October 15, 1998

Oh, days like these seem
Like dark clouds
In a bright, blue sky.
Old Memories come haunting,
Threatening my joy.
Pressures from all around are urgent.
Things are due-
From one minute to the next.
Why do I care so much-
For it to have so much power over my life?
Why do the shadows of old
Come to make my life miserable?
The flashbacks of past smiles
Scare me so that I fear to be conscious.
Is there not some resting place;
Where no one and nothing
Can oppress my mind?

If only screaming would help!
I would sound a yawp-
That would shake the soul of any man calm and happy.
Mine is the cry-
That would leave hearts lonely and empty.
Mine is the brawl-
That would make children run and hide
In the arms of their mothers.

No comfort is found.
No peace left to cover me safe.
There are even no tears to shed,
For my anguish is too great-
Heavy like a burden.
Under its weight, I've stumbled and fallen.

Summary of January 25, 1999

Blue sky-
A conflict resolved,
Among other joys:
Like a long hug,
A stolen glance,
A secret smile.
Tonight-
A fathomless sky-
Millions of wishes,
One for each star.
My soul takes refuge
Believing in each one.

Untitled: January 8, 1999

My heart skipped a beat;
But it wasn't you.
Why do I hold you?
Why can't I let you go?
I see you.
The world around me stops-
I inhale.
Fervent hope bursting my insides
Out- comes my breath.
The shadow is gone.
Our times replayed- vanish,
Thin as air.