Trying something new on the blog.

A reflections kind of post.

I’ve got a prayers category (which is long overdue for a good dusting off) and I’ll be setting up an affirmations category (which I’ve learned – at least for me – requires a different kind of writing and mindspace)…and there is already The Daily Race category (which is meant to be a less formal review of an event during the day), but what I dreamt up this evening doesn’t really fit any of those things just right…though in some ways, it encompasses them all.

I’m starting off with dividing the day into 5 sections…we’ll see if that sticks. It may evolve…or shift…as life changes.

And you can chuckle with me…as I was considering what kind of post titles would go with these write-ups, I initially thought about adding up the days of my life to call out each post by day. You know…Reflections on Day ADD A REALLY BIG NUMBER HERE.

But I didn’t want to do that much math…

/rolls eyes at myself/

So, I am moving forward with Year and Day…

I should surely know how many years I’ve been on this earth. And my agenda lets me know what day of the year it is…

And, with that, I’m off and rolling!

Things I’m Proud Of

I owned my kitchen today.

Meal prep for the kid’s school lunches, including fresh-cut vegg and chicken bites. And I decided to challenge him a bit. Normally, I spice the chicken with some kind of all-purpose spice mix (usually the green lid Adobo; sometimes, the red) and keep on rolling. This week, I decided to make 3 out of the 5 lunch portions sweet and sour chicken. I know that he likes the flavor of sweet and sour, but he’s not accustomed to his lunch meat being “tampered with” in that way. We’ll see how it goes. He surprises me…in both ways – sometimes, he rolls so easily, I don’t even know Autism is a part of our lives; and sometimes, it is very, very evident as he digs in his heels for something that seems so familiar…losing ground on territory we’ve already claimed.

During this focused meal-prep, I sectioned off a dinner-sized portion for Mr. J. The man continues to refuse my money, but I know he won’t refuse something that I’ve crafted in the kitchen. I try to send over food-food and not just goodies since he’s diabetic. I’m not trying to kill the man with my thankfulness. I kept my eye on his driveway all afternoon until I saw his truck, gathered up my courage and walked over. Funny how, still even after all this time, it takes me gathering my self-conscience feelings to go over and invade his space. If I could somehow zap my container of food to appear on his kitchen counter, I would probably choose that option. With a little smiley face post-it note, of course. We chatted for a bit and talked of my upcoming adventures in trying my hand at making pound cake using only honey.

I swept, cleaned the ceiling fan in the dining room and did laundry.
WASHED ALL THE DISHES (and have pruny finger tips to prove it).

I continued to hone my “Talk Dirty” Radio on Pandora. It’s a weird mix of songs; 85% of which make me want to dance. Somehow, there’s always a slow song at the right time so that I can catch my breath. A little more customization and I might share a link to it so that others can listen. Maybe.

I hula hooped. After cleaning my hoop, of course, because I am sure that it’s been more than a year since I’ve done that. I have these amazing, big, fat hula hoops. The kind that you see at festivals. The kind that are supposed to be easier to hula to because they’re bigger and are more forgiving with the speed at which you hula. They’re supposed to be a good workout; definitely a positive activity to strengthen core muscles. I had an interesting conversation during Spring Break with a friend of mine who – after getting caught up on my journey with RA – asked what the state of my muscle strength was – because, let’s be honest, Intermittent Fasting doesn’t really tackle the strength and cardio part of a healthy lifestyle. She had a good point. And, it’s been on my mind. Now that the meds are working their magic, getting back to an active lifestyle. Not because I want to be skinny (based on the family genes, there’s no chance of that), but because I want to be strong. If I hope to run a farm in the future, I need not only to have my pain under control, but I also need to haul and lift and move and…you get the idea. Strength is going to be important. And, I’ve lost a lot of it. Along with stamina. So…it was 20 minutes of hula hooping today, to get the ball rolling on adding some kind of activity to the mix.

Things I’m Not So Proud Of

Why in the word do I still struggle to walk over to my neighbors house to drop off yummy-goodness and have a quick conversation?! I mean, sure; I did it. But not easily. This frustrates me. This is a character trait that seeps into other areas of my life, and it’s…well, it can hold me back. I know that it does. It has in the past.

I finished a whole cake. I was going to save some for the kid, but no – I ate it all. Greedy and indulgent. And there’s no space for grace in the fact that I at least took 2 days to eat it. Eating a cake in 2 days is still not cool. And not that I think the kid would have liked it; he may not have even been willing to try it. But I didn’t give him the chance. And now, all that (awesome, delicious) sugary, fattiness is hanging out in my system. Yea. I didn’t need that.

What I’m Praying About – Leaning into the Light

We had severe storms today. Greensboro saw a tornado touch down. People are without power. Some lost their houses. One lost their life (which means that many will be grieving). There’s a lot of damage in this area of the state. And I am sensitive to the loss and hurt to people who live nearby; some who I know.

A little closer to home, there are some unknowns ahead. I know that doesn’t offer a lot of insight, but that’s the point. I’ve been struggling with next steps – in a few different areas of life – and while I feel some things are being resolved, I’m not so confident and just trying to listen with my whole heart to the Source and lean into the light. I’ve asked for wisdom and patience – and a good sense of humor – and apparently, I was in this same place 9 years ago.

Oh, life.

With Much Appreciation

While I send prayers to those who are hurting nearby, I am thankful that the storm wasn’t worse here at Plethora Pointe. Nothing like seeing lighting just over your head to remind you that you don’t have a good emergency plan in place. I swear, I almost peed my pants it was so loud. And yes, I was outside to experience this. WHY? Because I was getting the laundry out of the dryer. Excellent timing on my part. Typical. So, I am thankful. And challenged to consider getting an Emergency Plan in place for both in the house and in the garage.

Had a really good catch up session with the kid’s dad today at drop off. Thankful they made it safety through the weather. I was walking around the house stressing about them being on the road, and I literally had to give it over to the Universe…Look. My boys are on the road. I know that worrying isn’t going to change their fate. But I need you to know that I want them here safe and sound. Please. That’s pretty much how that conversation went. And I am thankful that, despite a few rough spots on the road, they made it whole and well. We talked of plans for the kid’s upcoming birthday. 13. THIRTEEN. I am thankful for that. For real.

While the wet and temperature shift have been playing their tricks on my overall pain levels and mobility, I covered a lot of ground today. I danced around the house. I got up on a chair to clean a ceiling fan. I hula hooped, for goodness sake. All good things.

Looking Forward with Purposeful Anticipation

The Durham Ballet offers a free showing every year for the special needs community and their families/caregivers. This is an event that the kid and I have been attending since 2014. And this year, I’m trying to make it a family thing. I am not sure how this is going to pan out, but so far, I’ve got takers. And by the time the day gets here, I may feel in over my head, but I know how much the kid looks forward to this, and I know how important it is to him to feel/see/connect with his people, so I am going to do my best to make it happen.

I had a magical conversation with a friend last week who has reviewed a contractor outline and has responded positively to jumping on board to help me organize the hot mess that has become my life. I am still in awe that this path as unfolded and I am hoping – not just hoping, planning – for many, many good things to come from this opportunity. This week, I’d like to get all the initial paperwork squared away and get her started on some project outlines. With her on board to help me manage administrative action items, I can clear time for development – for clients and for internal projects. This is going to be HUGE – in the best of ways.

So, it was a big day – and this is just the top level items.

What about you? Anything you want to share? I’d love to hear. Really.