It was a cheesy pick-up, but at least it was timely.
You get credit for being in the moment.
You also get credit for being…oh, I don’t know what the right word is…not sleazy.
The whole experience was delightfully genuine. You left no room for doubt of your interest in me, but remained respectful, appropriate and…eager.
Our conversation was fun – a mini tornado of words and positive feelings, shiny eyes. After, I felt as if I had been spun around the room, hand-in-hand with dance partner…happy, refreshed – out of breath.
I let myself soak it in.
Just for a minute.
It’s been a while since I felt that kind of feeling.
It was nice. And I definitely leaned into it.
But, only for a minute.
When you walked away, I remembered who I was, where I was…who I was with –
I remembered that there were lessons-learned that I needed to apply, lessons I needed to deliver…
Feelings fade; reason endures.
Purpose is paramount.
There’s always a bit of reservation in me, and I hope it didn’t spoil the moment for you.
Of course, the bigger spoiler was probably that I didn’t respond to your sweet, sweet follow up.
Would you believe me if I told you I didn’t know what to do, what to say next; that I realized you were an experience I had to process to decide how much I’m willing to let truth and honesty guide my next steps.
Does that sound as brutal to your ears as it does to mine?
You are a gentleman.
(Okay. Maybe not, but within the moments we’ve shared, that’s the part you’ve played.)
It seems, I am still learning how to be a lady.
(Okay. Maybe that’s who you think I am, but trust me, I come from a heritage of whoredom, and I’m blazing my own trail to leave behind me the lust and love-lies of the bloodline.)
Was that too philosophical for you?
I’m an Aquarius proper…and I’m afraid, I’ll always be too detached for you, reveling in the lessons from disappointment, revering the rational over the romantic…
…always pressing forward to the distance…
(…whether you’re holding my hand or not.)